Battle

There are times when certain things carry you back to place where you never want to be again. Mind is the best of the things we have got and the worst of it too. You stay happy only till memories are blurred or covered. Is acceptance real? How does it take place? 

Because every-time you look back or even when you move forward, it feels like past haunts like dust in a dirty mirror in which you are looking in. It's not in you anymore but you are not able to part from it yet. And this continues for so ever. I wonder when it will stop or will it ever? 

It's like some doors about which you have instructed yourself well "Do NOT Open." But, sometimes when you pass by them, you desire to look in. You feel, we are so much over it and it won't bother you anymore. But, you realize you were wrong. All things start returning. It might be that you are strong yet not strong enough to bear this right now. You decide to close the door and not come back again. It's not easy to close it because the monster that was inside is exerting it's force to come out of the room. You know that you cannot lose this battle, else your sanity will be wiped out. For the monster will soon take over your entirety. The monster is overpowering and you feel so weak and on the verge of losing it all...

But, can we pause for a moment and think that if we can bear to make the monster go out of the house for once and all, we will be free from it forever? Can we risk some time which might range from a few weeks to months or even years and make that monster disappear from our lives ? We realize the goal is an impossible one. But, as they say, "Difficult is what takes a little time, Impossible is what takes a little longer."

So, what do you decide? 

To always fear that chamber and let it harm you till breathes stop or to just let it go? Let go, however painful the process be, however much the chaos rise in you and even if it seems to be taking life out of you.  The life after this is assumed to be much better than the earlier stage, so why not give a try? 

Deep in  resides a fear, a "What if?" What if, things don't go as we had planned? What if you are not able to make the monster go away and it spreads to all of you. Will you be able to survive then? Isn't this partial pain much better than this...

Life is about illogical patterns. Why not try once to do something not done before, for it's not important to be strong, it's important to feel strong. In adventure lies life! Hope you got it right. :)

-Rashmi :)